Monday, October 20, 2008

Confessions of a Canadian Wannabe

Today's guest poster holds a special place here in the hearts of Us & Them. Before Mary from Unmitigated came along, Us and Them merely plodded along in comment-less obscurity. We were ocassionally visited from the likes of Jodi of Jodiferous and Tracy from Kaply, Inc, but otherwise it was bleak and lifeless out here on the tundra. Then Mary came along and left a comment. I followed her back to her own site and left a few comments of my own. Next thing I know she's back, and she's brought Mama Dawg with her. It all went to hell in a hand basket after that.

Confessions of a Canadian Wannabe

Ahhhh, the Great White North. I have lived all my life in Canada. Well, not exactly in Canada. Not in the literal, I-am-a-Canadian-citizen sense.

Okay, I live in Detroit. I live closer to Canada than Sarah Palin does to Russia. How's that for close? And I'm a hockey fanatic! I live in a town that calls itself Hockeytown! Of course we also call ourselves Motown, or Murder City, U.S.A., but that just serves to illustrate my point! Doesn't it? I guess not, but these are interesting and mostly true things.

Venue change: I was composing at the dining room table, and have moved to the more comfy couch so I can look at the gorgeous maple trees outside--Maple! Like on the Canadian flag! Here's some of the gorgeous color right outside my window in the morning sun:

Back to hockey. Detroit is the proud possessor of an Original Six team. We Original Six fans are arrogant bastards. As if our teams are the best because they've been around longer than any others. They are, of course. Better, I mean. Montreal, Boston, Toronto, Detroit, NY Rangers, and Chicago. Here's a picture of my insanely expensive Original Six hoodie:

I was willing to put out the bucks for this item because I blew it with the jacket. One time at the Joe, (that's what real hockey fans call Joe Louis Arena, named after famous defenseman, Joe Louis) I saw this gorgeous taupe-colored leather varsity jacket. The Original Six logos were embroidered across the back. It was $375. Even though it would have been the perfect winter jacket and lasted for years, I was too cheap to buy it. When I caved in and sent Husband back to get it for me for Christmas? It was gone. And no one makes them anymore. How much did that suck? A lot. Even with the exchange rate.

So there's my love for hockey. That's one thing. Also? I love curling. Not my hair. With stones. And a skip, and brooms. There's a Detroit Curling Club. How many of you knew that? Curling is one of the reasons I love the Winter Olympics, and a reason I love the winter Olympics on the CBC. Living in Metro Detroit means we have Canadian programming included on our basic cable packages. Woohoo! Rick Mercer, Peter Mansbridge, and Don Cherry (EVERY night is Hockey Night in Canada)! Incidentally, I feel certain that one day, Ron MacLean will be nominated for sainthood. Did you notice that I ended up back on the hockey topic?

If all that is not enough to convince you that I am Canadian at heart, there's also this: I like vinegar on my fries. But only because you can't buy poutine around here.


  1. I saw it differently. What I noticed is that I showed up, and you got a paid year off work!

  2. Bawahaha1 MAW Comment? Glorious and classic. And curling? For reals? Awesome.

  3. Wow, I guess my mom is a Canadian at heart too. I thought when she put vinegar on her fries, she was just trying to keep me from stealing them off her plate.. I owe her an apology.

  4. I love the change of seasons the colors are beautiful. I would love to go to Canada I hear it's beautiful and they have great Quilt Shops.......uh stay on the program Fran. And Jen the thing with the fries both is right.

  5. I LIVE for watching curling on TV during the winter olympics! I hate to tell you that it just cracks me the fuck up! I watch it for entertainment...BUT, because I love you MAW, I will not tell you that I make fun of your sport. That would just be rude.

  6. So you're the original stalker of the Captain? Nicely done. Do beer curls count as curling? If so, I'm totally Canadian. I also like vinegar on my fries.

  7. So, you like hockey. Just a little. I can tell.

    I LOVE vinegar on my fries, and on my spinach. I think that makes me, "someone who likes vinegar on their fries and spinach".

    Fantastically gorgeous maple tree.

  8. I feel like the entire Internet is down with hockey and I don't know the first thing about it!

  9. Yes, hockey. I'm not a fan, but I respect your dedication MAW. You are obviously a true fan, and I get that.

    The tree is just gorgeous. I think I will have to go hunt down some better trees that the pathetic specimens we've got in our neighborhood.

    How have I never heard of this poutine? The Captain does not speak of it. I googled it, because I didn't know what the heck you were talking about and at first I thought "ew" because the picture on Wikipedia looks like someone threw up on a plate of french fries. But I kept reading and now I am intrigued. I must find this stuff and try it.

    Great guest post!

  10. I keep praying that they aren't just teasing me when they say we are getting a hockey team here in K.C. I cannot explain it, but I love that game.


    TV ruins it.

  11. Nice guest post! The pics are truly outstanding. I love Fall foliage. Heh.

    I once hitch-hiked to Canada from where I lived in Bellingham, not too far south of the border. True story. I missed the poutine, but I did visit Richards On Richards, back when it was a 80's techno club.

  12. yeah, we were old school... we liked you way back then.

  13. I lived in Ottawa for 2 years and I miss the fall colours. Gorgeous. We don't really get swathes of colour like that out here on the Wet Coast.

  14. Of course your Canadian, a
    fellow Curler. Dangerous game that. 1st season I played, my team members suggested a
    "wisk" broom," so I wouldn't
    have to keep getting up that cold icy floor.
    Takes guts at 30 below to
    get the initiative to go
    out and play on the ice for a couple of hours!

    and I do remember the "Real
    Hockey Teams," the hockey
    season was a can't miss and
    it also managed to stay within a 6 month time frame.
    As Cpt. Dumbass' Mom, I salute your post.

  15. I ♥ Canadian Bacon. SEND ME MY CITIZENSHIP.

  16. Very cute post. I will back to read more when Captain Dumbass is here too because I've heard so much about him. And I like the word dumbass.

  17. Canada is too cold for this southern blood. It might be nice to visit though. Maybe I can pull a Steenky (yes she is now a verb) and arrive on the Captain's doorstep.


Come on, sailor. I love you long time.