We'll call her... co-worker B.
COB: I just left work...annoyed.
Me: What happened?
COB: What you mean?
Me: U said u were annoyed. At what?
COB: Work... I ok now.
Me: Ok, good.
COB: I go hospital now, spam you later.
Me: Have fun. Don't lick anything.
COB: I am gonna steal toilet paper.
Me: Excellent! Get some bed pans 4 the office. We'll be more efficient.
COB: This is a one man band. Get your own.
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Come on, sailor. I love you long time.