Thursday, September 18, 2008

Life Lessons

Liam: I'm going to be a droid!

Mommy: I'm going to be Boba Fett.

Liam: No! Boba Fett is bad!

Daddy: Well, that's not entirely true, hon. Boba Fett was a free agent, a contractor. Sure he was working for the bad guys when we saw him, but that doesn't necessarily mean he was bad. He could just as well have been working for the Alliance, hell, maybe he did. We get to see very little of him and don't really know his story. Did he have a family to support? Kids to put through college? That's not cheap, you know. Maybe he really hated it, but his love for his children meant he had to make some sacrifices, even if it meant going against his morals. I worked for an organization much like the Imperial Empire. It was soul crushing and I hated it, but it paid the bills and kept a roof over your head. Sure I could have left whenever I wanted, but places like that suck you in with their medical/dental benefits and accrued holidays. Those things are tough to give up, little man. A set up as big as the Empire, the pay was probably bad, but I'll bet the benefits made it worth it. Never underestimate a good benefit plan. And if the have an employee share purchase plan, you jump into that right away! You wouldn't believe how fast those things can add up. Look, Han Solo had a legitimate bounty on his head. A man's gotta pay his dues or pay the price, son. Not everything is black and white. I know you're only three and you've already gone off and found something more interesting in your nose, but these things are important and you might as well start learning them now. This shit's going to start coming at you pretty fast.


  1. Boba Fett was just a slave to "the man". Not all of us can be blessed with high midi-chlorian counts. Stoopid Jedis.

  2. Don't worry, I'm sure he absorbed all of that, subconsciously.

  3. If the Tater had been a Man Child, I was pushing to name him Boba Fett. Cutie McWifey did not think it was as cool as I did.
    Life lessons through Star Wars.
    Fucking Brilliant.
    Oh. And I've not heard about that Zombie book you mentioned. But I'm definately asking my "book guy" at our Local Indie Book Store.
    Zombies kick ass.
    Almost as much as Boba Fett.
    'Cept they don't have Jet Packs.
    Zombies with Jet Packs would be fuckin' scaaaaary.

  4. it's pretty much all star wars life lessons in our house with Josh. except when they are indiana jones life lessons.

  5. ha ha star wars life lesson...i think he'll get it :)

  6. Deep down, he totally dug you. Or his nose. Whatever.

  7. God, that's funny. And too true.

    My brother dressed up like Boba Fett one year for halloween in like 1985. It was an awesome costume, back in the days when the plastic mask was held on by a rubber band, and there were the vaguest little openings to see and breathe through.

    This post reminds me of:

    One of the funniest things I've ever seen.

  8. Just found your blog -
    Life lessons via Star Wars references. This place is great. I shall return again and again.

  9. Whoa, Dad. Pretty heavy stuff for a little dude. Even one that's willing to handle snails.

  10. kat-hell ya!

    ellie-he's pretty smart for 3

    ciii-you sir are my hero.

    ali-Indy, thanks. I'll add that to my repetoire.

    ciara-I know I can get their attention that way.

    mamadawg-I think it was more his nose, but it's a start.

    bc-I've seen that, but thanks. Eddie Izzard is freakin hilarious.

    jaime-welcome aboard and thanks!

    maw-what? Too strong? Maybe I should have broken it down to smaller lessons?

  11. Can you come to Texas and educate my son? BC I don't speak star wars and he would totally dig on that!
    Sort of a Star Wars lesson on selling your soul to the man huh? Yeah, I can understand that...back to work at 8 pm. Yeah, I suck.

  12. Would you come give my kids the talk about the birds and the bees by using Star Wars parables? I'm sure you could work something clever and tasteful in. Please, I don't want my daughter to wind up in a gold bikini like I did.

  13. that was good. Can you come over and give MY son some lectures? All I got is Terms of Endearment and Hellboy.

  14. Oj jeebus, thats hilarious. And go Boba!

  15. Boy, you must have had weird

  16. stiletto mom-I'd love to visit Texas, especially since it's going to start raining here soon until April.

    jbg-and Utah would be a definite stop on my journey through the States. The gold bikini, was that like a Princess Leia thing?

    vodka mom-not sure what State you're in, but I'd be happy to. I'm not sure how I'm going to squeeze a lecture around Terms of Endearment and Hell Boy but I like a challenge.

    surfer jay-dude

  17. jerlyn-oh the stories I could tell...wait a minute!

  18. Ha! Yes. Boba Fett is the Switzerland of Star Wars, just standing by and collecting fees.


Come on, sailor. I love you long time.