Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Toothpaste & Gorillas

Ran out of toothpaste this morning and used the kid's instead. What the hell? Why do adults get screwed out of all the cool flavours? Mint is great for gum or a mint julip (no idea what that is, just fit) but for my toothpaste? Give me bubble gum with sparklies any day. Just pump some more fluoride in there and we're good to go. I'll brush my teeth 4 or 5 times a day.

I was going to make some comment about being more willing to brush my teeth in the morning, but thinking about it, I can't wait to brush my teeth in the morning. My breath smells like gorilla ass when I wake up.

Actually, it's not really my breath that smells that bad, but because I like sleeping in my own bed I'll just pretend that it is mine.

Whoo boy! Yep, I gots me some stank ass breath. Damn, that's nasty!


  1. When I was a kid, there was a toothpaste commercial where the kids actually liked the taste of the toothpaste. The mom said, "Maybe they'll brush longer!" Obviously she meant that they wouldn't spit the shit out after 15 seconds, but to my developing little mind, it meant that most people stop brushing at age 12, but these kids would be hooked until 18 or so!

  2. You may be onto something here. Margarita flavored toothpaste, G&T flavored toothpaste . . .


Come on, sailor. I love you long time.