"You Don't Much Look Like A Steer To Me"*

I've only posted five times this month. What the hell? Last April I posted sixteen times and the April before that, fifty-eight. Fifty-eight posts in a month? Freak. Excuse me while I sit back and ponder that whilst stuffing another piece of chocolate ganache cake in my mouth.



I just used 'whilst' in a sentence. Did I use it correctly? Who cares, I'm eating chocolate ganache and you're not!



Had to take my oldest in for a blood test this week. He sat in my lap while I held both his arms down with the assistance of another lab techie while a third managed to stick him. His arm is so bruised he looks like a junkie. Oh, and he's fine. We're just trying to find out why he is such an asshole to his little brother who worships the ground he walks on. The tests were inconclusive.



My odometer is speaking to me in binary.

Ever heard of the 365 project on flickr? The idea is you take a picture a day for an entire year. In a Collection A Day, artist Lisa Congdon takes a picture of a collection of random things everyday.

There's a huge dandelion outbreak in my neighbourhood this year. Can't figure out why.



A great big thank you to Middle Aged Woman who sent us this framed pic from Tera of Olive Hue Design (I'm still going to get the zombie pic, Tera!) as a baby present.


Middle Aged Woman may not be so sweet if Vancouver and Detroit meet in the next round of playoffs though.

Oh, and I'm employed yet again. I won't say by who, only that it's a large North American retailers whose name rhymes with cheers, steers, beers, tears, queers, fears, nears and arrears. I'm in housewares. HOUSEWARES! Ahahahahahahaaa... ha ha... ha... sniff sniff. What the hell am I doing in housewares?

Check out Keely's for more Random Tuesday fun.


*Title anyone?

I Am...

Here.

Cause Real Windows Aren't As Cool

I wasn't planning on posting today since we just got back from a weekend trip to see my family, but I just found this and had to share. Share with the hopes that someone will set up a fund where people can donate money so I can buy cool things like this. Never know until you try, right?




via

A Long Time Ago, In A Galaxy Far Far From Kosher

What if I could combine two of my favourite things in the world, Star Wars and bacon?

"The Bacon AT-AT stands 3 ft tall and is made with over 40 lbs of bacon. The body was made from foam, then the bacon was attached. This beast took 21 non-stop hours to build. If you've ever once thought to cook 40 lbs of bacon in your kitchen in one sitting, I can now personally advise against it."

I know, where do I go from here, right? How about Ewoks and Care Bears?

A few days ago Connor is in the bathroom peeing when his little brother decides to join him. Once Liam started Connor yells out, "Don't cross the streams!" My kids are that awesome.

Did you miss the reference? If so, maybe this tshirt from Think Geek will help.

Update: I am officially changing Supreme Leader's name to Darth Enabler. Her and her incubating Sith apprentice are slowing pushing me to the fatty side of the Force with their cravings for all that is delicious and good. I'm just trying to be supportive.

Can I ground my kids for eating all my Girl Guide cookies?

Finally, I saw this on kottke last weekend and damn near peed myself with glee. Maybe it's a guy thing.

"The centrifuge is a genuinely terrifying device. The lights dim when it is switched on. A strong wind is produced as the centrifuge induces a cyclone in the room. The smell of boiling insulation emanates from the overloaded 25 amp cables. If not perfectly adjusted and lubricated, it will shred the teeth off solid brass gears in under a second. Runs were conducted from the relative safety of the next room while peeking through a crack in the door."

*PS. (because my finally's are never final) My nephew Dakoda's birthday is on July the 4th, and this year my sister decided to take him down to the States so he could enjoy some fireworks. She needs to know where the best place in Seattle would be to watch them and ideally, find a hotel close by. Any Seattle-ites out there with a suggestion?


Bacon AT-AT, Ewoks,

2022: A Popcorn Odyssey

Hey, happy belated Easter, here's a picture of my youngest son shooting cross country skiers. Wait. That might need some explanation.

Back when the Olympics were still on, BC Lottery had a pavilion set up where you could try out some of the different winter sports. There was hockey, where you could shoot a puck at a net for prizes, a virtual reality bobsled and biathlon. My boys being my boys, they immediately ran for the guns.

Liam will be five in two weeks, so I figure the first Olympics he'll be able to compete in will be in 2022. With his head start he'll be sure gold by then. Unless they're serving caramel popcorn.

That may change things.

Jesus, Darth Vader and Pi

North By Northwest: The Empire Strikes Back.

Is there any movie that can not be made better with the addition of a TIE fighter and light sabers? I think not.

Watching my wife struggle through all the joys of pregnancy makes me so very very happy I was born with a penis. Miracle of childbirth? Ya, you can keep it.

Pi plate.


Get it?

Kashi would be more appealing if it didn't taste like a handful of wood chips and dirt.

Giant Darth Vader balloon head. Just because. I'd tie this to my roof if I could afford it.

Did Jesus ask to get super-sized? Researchers at the Cornell Food and Brand Lab studied fifty-two depictions of The Last Supper painted between 1000 AD and 2000 AD and discovered that:

"portion sizes of main courses (usually eel, lamb and pork) depicted in the paintings grew by 69 percent over time, while plate size grew by 66 percent and bread size grew by 23 percent."

And sticking with religious art, have you ever seen the Sistine Chapel? Click on this. No, seriously. Do it. Ok, if you don't do it now, come back later and do it. And be patient if if takes a moment or two to load, just think how long it took to paint.

Ok, that's all I got. For more Random Tuesday foolishness, click on the purple button.

Tastes Like Chicken

The other night we were having chicken wings for dinner. Connor and Liam were pretending they were eating dinosaurs instead of chicken when Liam decides to throw some variety into the game.

Connor: I'm eating a pteranodon.
Liam: I'm eating an airplane.
Connor: You can't eat an airplane.
Liam: No, the guy who flies it.

He's a bucket load of cute, but I'm having trouble sleeping now.

PS. Yes, he's eating ice cream in this picture but I didn't have any of him eating a make believe human part.