Dad, Liam told me he was going to eat my eyebrows!
The day after Christmas we're sitting at the dinner table enjoying turkey leftovers when a mini-foot ball flies across the table and hits Liam in the eye. Hard. I look up at Connor with an it-must-have-been-the-tryptophan-because-I-know-you-could-not-possibly-just-have-done-what-I-think-you-just-did death stare only to find him looking back at me with the stink eye because he knows he's busted and this is how he responds instead of just admitting his guilt. I'd like to say I approached the issue calmly and quietly and not like Homer Simpson strangling Bart, but that didn't happen, though I did manage to keep my hands off his neck. His excuse?
He told you to? He freakin told you to? Is this supposed to be funny? Funny how? I mean funny like you're a clown, you amuse me? You make me laugh, you're here to freakin amuse me?
*throbbing vein in forehead*
Supreme Leader has been crocheting like mad lately. I want this.
Pre-Xmas conversation between my sister and I.
Sister: Hey, it's getting really close to Christmas, what should I get for the boys? Me: Meh, just get them some gift cards for Toys R Us. What should I get for Mik and Dakoda? Sister: Gift cards are probably easiest. Me: .... Sister: .... Me: How about you just buy your kids a couple of gift cards and say they're from us and we'll do the same. Sister: That works. What about Finn? Me: *thinking about much younger step brother* Are you going to see dad before Christmas? Sister: Ya. Me: How about you pick up one more gift card for Josh and we'll get another for Finn? Sister: How lame are we? Me: Whatever, it works.
And with that I direct your attention to the Un-Mom's where you're sure to find a plethora of Random Tuesday hijinks. Or Keely's zombie savaged corpse slowly beginning to reanimate. Either way it's sure to be entertaining.