As I was fixing up my americano in Starbucks this morning a woman came in with such an amazing posterior that I'm not sure I really saw it. It was too perfect. No insult to all my favourite's out there, and you know who you are. RIGHT, HON!? You think I'm joking, or just being a man, but I'm serious. Muzak, conversation, work, everyone and everything stopped as all eyes were drawn to her light blue Lululemon-clad glutes. Men, woman, children and the elderly all gazed in wonder at her sculpture-like buttocks. Beside me an elderly man wiped away a tear nodding to himself like, yes, this is why I've lived this long. A young child looked up at her mother and pointed. Her mother looked down with a smile that said, 'yes, I know.'
When Plato spoke of his shadow images this was the first image of ass. Was that Plato? No, it was Socrates. Wait, it was a fictional dialogue with Socrates. I should ask Black Hockey Jesus. It's important to get your Greek philosophers straight when talking about female anatomy.
**Ok, so I started this about 8am this morning and coming back to it now at 1pm I really have nowhere to go.
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When else will you get to label something ass, Plato, Socrates, and Starbucks?
ReplyDeleteWished I had these ideas back when I was in school.
ReplyDeleteYeah, it was Plato. Plato kind of "is" Socrates. Long story.
ReplyDeleteSpeaking of philosophy, it is said that Thales, the father of philosophy, was inspired to speculate on the essential nature of things as a result of seeing s smoking hot ass.
Dude. Loved the old man teardrop and the silent connection between mother & daughter. Awesome.