As I was fixing up my americano in Starbucks this morning a woman came in with such an amazing posterior that I'm not sure I really saw it. It was too perfect. No insult to all my favourite's out there, and you know who you are. RIGHT, HON!? You think I'm joking, or just being a man, but I'm serious. Muzak, conversation, work, everyone and everything stopped as all eyes were drawn to her light blue Lululemon-clad glutes. Men, woman, children and the elderly all gazed in wonder at her sculpture-like buttocks. Beside me an elderly man wiped away a tear nodding to himself like, yes, this is why I've lived this long. A young child looked up at her mother and pointed. Her mother looked down with a smile that said, 'yes, I know.'
When Plato spoke of his shadow images this was the first image of ass. Was that Plato? No, it was Socrates. Wait, it was a fictional dialogue with Socrates. I should ask Black Hockey Jesus. It's important to get your Greek philosophers straight when talking about female anatomy.
**Ok, so I started this about 8am this morning and coming back to it now at 1pm I really have nowhere to go.
Fran Leibowitz on books and reading
9 hours ago