Wii: Where have you been? Me: I... we were on holiday. Wii: You've been gone for days. Me: Well, we went to visit my family, we haven't been up there since last fall. Wii: And did you excercise while you were gone? Me: Um... well... we didn't really have the time. It was cold up there. Wii: Really? And you ate healthy? Me: ... Wii: Did cholesterol take a vacation too? Me: My knee has been a little sore lately... Wii: I'm going to hurt you. You should know that right now. Me: It's only been a few days, come on. Wii: 'Only a few days.' A few days of eating like a pig, not exercising and ignoring me. Me: You don't have to make this personal. Wii: Sometimes I wonder if you really love me... Me: What? Wii: I only hurt you because I care about you. Me: You're making me uncomfortable. Wii: I own your bitch ass, don't forget that.