He Blogs/She Blogs: Sex, Hair, Secrets & Control

Damn, Monday again, eh? Wait, I'm unemployed... no biggie then. Not only that, since I'm on the West Coast and the majority of you aren't, I'm still asleep! Hey, don't look at me like that. Like the new banner for He Blogs, She Blogs? Ya? I had nothing to do with it. Petra, she's not just a really pretty face.

Ok, before we get to the questions, a few programming notes. We're going to be moving HBSB to Thursdays for awhile. HBSB's chi didn't feel quite right so after consulting a feng shui master it was decided that Thursday would be a much better day. Personally, I was a little leery of his results, but after getting liquored up this weekend and throwing the chicken bones, I've decided he is probably right. So, on we go.

First question is from Bad Karma and I guess I'll have to answer respectfully since if I don't I might be grounded.

Age old question that has never
been addressed. Why do men clutch
the tv remote to their chests,
why do they carry them with them
around the house. and WHY for
heaven sake do they insist on flicking through channels to 1/2
watch some other show-AND MISS
GOING BACK TO THE SHOW U WERE
TRYING TO WATCH.
a lot of hostility here!!!

Why do we keep the remotes? Because the remote is power. It's control, and in the wrong hands, it's dangerous. I don't know what you're talking about with missing the show you were watching because that NEVER happens with me, which is why I keep the magic stick. My ability to internally count down the time between commercial breaks is frightening. Do you know what mitochondria are? They're cells that, amongst other things, act as a timer for all your other cells. That's how good I am at changing channels or running off to go to the bathroom or get something to eat and be back in time. It's on the cellular level. I'm one with the remote.

Alice said...

Okay, here's one for you: why the h*ll can't I see Mr. Linky? I can't link up on any of the good Carnivals anymore!

All right, maybe that won't work for heblogs/sheblogs. How about the long hair vs. short hair thing?


Mr. Linky? Sorry, Alice, but I think I'm missing some back ground for this one. As for the short hair versus long hair question? Hmm, I like it both ways. {Spidey senses tingling} Wait, let me rephrase that. I think it all depends on the woman. And personal preference. Or not. I don't find one woman sexier over another because of her hair, it's what works on her. I think the back of a woman's neck is very sexy, but it doesn't matter if I can see it because her hair is cut short or if it's tied up. As a man, if a woman is willing to have sex with me, or continually have sex with me, she could be wearing a hockey helmet. Who cares.


Moonspun said...

ANYway...question for HBSB: What's you belief on 'spousal privilege?' If your BFF or someone tells you a secret and says "don't tell anyone" do you think they will know you are going to tell your better half? Because it's that what your better half is for? To hold secrets like that because you trust them and need to bounce the secret off someone you know will be true to you. Thoughts?

Absolutely. How can you NOT tell a secret? Holding secrets in is bad for you, some would say potentially fatal. You have to tell someone and it should be the one person who knows all of yours. Well, everything after Witness Protection built you a new identity. Not only is your better half for secrets, for men, they're for everything. Once we're married we can stop remembering SO MUCH STUFF. Birthdays, anniversaries, social insurance numbers... the list is endless. See, you think we're dumb, but really, we're just making room for valuable information like sporting stats, movie dialogue and car stuff.

Giggle Pixie said...

Why can't I get my husband to understand that walking into a room and saying "Wanna go have sex?" doesn't exactly make my motor purr?

Especially when, if I take him up on the offer, he throws off all his clothes, jumps into bed, and then just lays there waiting for me to "make something happen"?

Maybe try explaining to him that, much like the movies that used to scare him as a child, the porn he watched when he was younger isn't real. "It's just a movie." Or maybe beat him to the punch, get naked before he does and tell him to make something happen. That said, sometimes you want sex but don't necessarily want the whole production. The full meal deal is great, everybody loves it, but it takes a lot of time. And time is a big stumbling block between men and woman, because for the most part, we don't need it and you do. I realize that is a huge generalization, but it's mostly right. I'm not saying men don't want all the detail work or don't enjoy it as much as you, it's just that we can skip straight to the end and still enjoy ourselves. Long story short (heh), you've got to talk to your partner and make them talk to you.

That's the news and I am outta' here. Make sure you stop by Petra's for the coherent side of these questions and if you're coming from Petra's, thanks for stopping by. Please leave us some questions.