ίππος λευκός, or Liam, First Horseman Of The Apocalypse
Every weekend we go grocery shopping with the in-laws. Today Supreme Leader had to work so instead of going home after finishing up with father-in-law, the boys and I waited at the in-laws so we could pick her up when she was done.
I'm lying on my sister-in-law's bed watching TV (her room is a gathering point in the house since it has a computer and a TV that's not showing Chinese soap operas or variety shows)... and I know I had some more sentence that was supposed to follow those parentheses but I suddenly remembered some fresh gingerbread men came home with us and now I'm thinking a few of those bastards need to be drowned in hot chocolate and sent to a better place, like my stomach. Hold on.
GBM: Hey! This type of interrogation is clearly banned by the Geneva Convention! Me: Interrogation? I think we have a misunderstanding, my gingerbread friend.
GBM: Aaaah! You bastard!
Where was I? Right, so there I am, watching CNN trying to increase ad revenue off Israel's push into Gaza when Liam walks into the room and crawls up onto the bed. Then he carries on climbing up my legs until he's lying on my chest. Liam who has pretty much only heard three words from his parents for the last two weeks, "cover your mouth." Pestilence then reaches out and pulls my mouth open, leans forward and COUGHS STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH! What do you even say to that?!
And he eats furniture.
PS. The gingerbread men look like The Fly because the boys decided that M&M's weren't big enough and demanded Auntie use Smarties instead.