Have you seen how much strollers cost these days? What the hell is with that? Do my kid's first wheels really need to cost more than my first car? The answer is obviously no, but what if I wasn't fatally unemployed and had money to blow? With only sixteen weeks left before the arrival of boy number three, what would I get for him, if I could?
How about the Roddler from Kid Kustoms? Hells ya! The $3500 starting price would totally be worth showing up all the bitchy Starbucks stroller moms.
What about a crazy assed steampunk version? I don't know what the hell this is, but I like it. Not sure what it's worth, but it was built by Bent Fabrications. Just don't lean on it in the summer.
From Worrell, the Wiegen stroller. It screams "you can't afford me," which is probably why I like it.
Finally, the Helvetia. I couldn't find any information on this one at all aside from it being built in Switzerland in 1959, but I love the old school, low rider look to it. Classy. Just like me. Bwah ha ha ha ha!
But what about dad? Since we're throwing the imaginary gravy around and the '05 Caravan just isn't cutting it anymore, how about a pimped Dodge Challenger with gull wing doors? I could fit three car seats in the back of this, and my kids would never be late for school or doctors appointments.
And even if I was late I think the Mad Max stealth bomber look would buy me some back-the-hell-off better than the minivan does. And speaking of stealth bomber, this car was actually built by Galpin Auto Sports for the US Air Force and is coated with radar absorbing paint. Other reasons daddy needs this car:
- Silent exhaust system. No, like silent silent.
- Biometric door lock that only opens to the driver's thumbprint.
- Roof mounted camera that tracks any movement within a quarter mile.
- Thermal image projection on the front windshield.