Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Little Pig, Little Pig, Let Me In...



Is there anything as soul sucking as looking for a new job? I hate the searching. I hate interviews. My employment history has generally been one of falling into a job through random chance or because I knew somebody. Hey, if you're my somebody, give me a call, spare me this nightly assault on my self worth. My quiet evenings of catching up on blogs after the kids have gone to bed has turned into quiet evenings of scrolling through job finding sites or company websites and wondering who exactly meets all of these freaking qualifications? And how much do those old guys who collect aluminum cans pull in in a week?

When I updated my resume I pulled a lot of info off my former company's website to describe my old job. It looks great on paper. I'm wondering how I ever managed to get it. My biggest worry with it though is that it's going to pigeon-hole me into jobs of the same nature, which I really don't want. "Senior Customer Service Officer" looks all well and good, but I'd rather give myself a catheter than do that again. Well, unless somebody's going to throw boat loads of money at me, I can be bought.

Anyway, I've got the resumes flying out fast and furious now since my holiday at Club Med: SAHD is almost over. Don't worry, I won't be bitching about this for the next... well, however long it takes me to find work, just needed to vent before I jump into the frying pan again. Ok, I maaaaaaay complain again, but just once or twice. Or if I can't find anything at all. But then I'd just be complaining to myself since all of Supreme Leader's pay would be going towards our mortgage and we wouldn't have extra money for things like internet or electricity.

Paper route?

40 comments:

  1. Move to India.

    There you go: solved :)

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  2. Mate don't worry about electricity. You could always get the kids to generate it by running in a giant hamster wheel.

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  3. oh man. i remember that. wishing you luck. and a plane ticket to India.

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  4. Dude, there is always the public library for internet. Duh! ;) Good luck on the job search and you know where to find me to bitch and moan about it.

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  5. (chantingandswayingandsingingtomyself) "This is not happening, this is not happening, this is..."

    Testimony out there, my brother!

    Still, sometimes we need to do something until the right something comes along.

    I'd lend you my anti-soul sucking suit, but I had to send it out for some minor repairs.

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  6. Good luck with the job search.

    Go ahead and apply for those that you are not remotely qualified for. You may just get it. I'm the perfect example of resume bullshit at work.

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  7. I know a guy who claimed to have all kinds of training -which, of course he didn't have, on his resume. He got the job he wanted and he's been there for over 16 years. If you can deliver on the claims, go for it!

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  8. I have no words of advice. I'm pretty shocked your SAHD-blogger gig didn't pull in buckets of money. Have you don the How Much is My Blog Worth via Technorati? Sell it!

    UPDATE: You just made a year's salary! We'll miss you.

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  9. You could show up at BlogHer and whore yourself out. Dude, a year's salary in a weekend. Depending on your stamina.

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  10. such a hard job market
    it earns you some bitching time
    and hell us ladies do it monthly
    i think you have listened to plenty of ours
    your turn

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  11. With our Wonder Twin Powers combined, I reckon we could find a Shit Ton of aluminum cans.

    Sure, most of them would be emptied by Us, but, that's just cause we're True and Bonafied Entrepreneurs.

    Jobs are for Squares.

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  12. I hear paper routes are all the rage these days, I may make my kids get one so I can keep up my glamorous lifestyle.

    Happy job hunting and good luck. My hubby is doing the same and yes, it truly sucks to be out there.

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  13. amazing hilarious picture. And I have to tell you, looking for freelance work feels impossible lately. If I wait to come back from blogcation until I get another gig I might never come back. Sending you good luck if you promise to send some back when you're done with it.

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  14. SAHP is a pretty good gig, but the pay does suck. good luck on your job search. i do not envy you.

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  15. Sending "good job vibes" your way.

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  16. Oh gawd, I know how this feels. In a big way. I've been through this several times in my career and it definitely blows. Sending you good vibes and good luck!

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  17. I think that whole work thing is highly overrated.

    Ellie

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  18. Tell Supreme Leader to get a better job so she can support you in the manner to which you have grown accustomed. Or maybe you can sell a kidney.

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  19. dude - don't get me started on this - all i know is that unfortunately we take jobs that we don't want until we get to the one that we do. Right now I am the prime example of that - hate my job more than anything else in the world. I would honestly rather shove hot pokers in my eyes and ears than be here but i know i will get my dream job soon....hopefully before I am 80.

    Good luck and go ahead - bitch and moan away - it is your right to do so

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  20. But I thought you were some sort of bank executive. And the bank industry is going so strong right now that you shouldn't have any problems.

    Uh, never mind...

    Take unemployment, go back to school, get a nursing degree, and then you can insert your own catheter.

    Good luck.

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  21. I think everyone can agree that job hunting blows donkey butt. I tend to land a job and hold on for dear life just so I can avoid the looking for another job thing...I hate it!

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  22. Sell blood / sperm / plasma.

    Start a ponzi scheme.

    Boost cars.

    Become a pimp.

    Promise old people house repairs, take their money, and split.

    See, there's loads of work out there. :)

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  23. I HATE JOB SEARCHING! Good luck with it all because it truly sucks. And just keep in mind that because the economy sucks right now, it's going to be harder than ever!

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  24. Hey my husband has been looking for a job on and off for almost 2 years now. It sucks out there.

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  25. You could always be a hand model. Or else...How much is the Devil paying for a good soul these days.

    Seriously though. Good luck, I hope it happens for you fast.

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  26. I did hand modeling for a bit. Not worth it. I would totally hire ya.

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  27. Ugh, job hunting is the worst. And it is a complete energy sap. Go ahead and complain all you want. I'll listen.

    Have you gone to a head hunter or two? That's how I found my most recent soul sucking adventure. They know about jobs that just don't get advertised, and they do most of the work for you. For free. Try it, you'll like it.

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  28. Sorry :-( You were doing a great job at home keeping the kids company.

    Get a great interviewing book from the bookstore to pump up your game before your first interview.

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  29. Why don't you just write a book and then become rich and famous. There. Solved.

    ps if you do become rich and famous, I'm going to need 10% (of the US conversion - not your foreign nonsense..that's no good) for giving you this great advice.

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  30. Good luck with the job hunt.. I don't know if I am happy with the idea though. I mean, if you are no longer a SAHD, who will make grilled cheese porn.

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  31. There is no question that job hunting is a big suck-fest! Maybe you could put us all down as personal references? That would either make people treat you like you had the plague, or they'd hire you in an instant!

    Just sayin'.

    PS - Love that picture.

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  32. Job hunting sucks, I feel for ya. If you don't mind the commute, I could use a full time nanny/housekeeper for the next six weeks or so. It's better than nothing.

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  33. Jen @ Blissfully Caffeinated, gotta love her... If you want to start a business I know this guy in Nigeria, you just need to wire me some money to get his info but it's totally legit...

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  34. Customer service jobs are about all you can find in Kentucky...I've done tech support for 11 years, and despite the fact that I am burned out, I am holding on to the job like grim death...
    I wonder if anybody is looking for a cat juggler?

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  35. Good luck on the job search...and I agree about job hunting. I have only been in the working world for 9 1/2 years and 4 years were with one company and 5 with another. I am too lazy to search for greener pastures.

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  36. Good luck job searching! It is a drag!

    However, bright lights on the horizon, I hear there are going to be shovel-ready jobs ... hmmm someday? (he he)

    It'll all work out and for the best in the end, blessings on ya search!

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  37. I hear ya. I feel the same way. When you get your jobs by accident or through friends, it can be fine and all, but sometimes it really feels good to get a good job on your own. It also feels really crappy to be pidgeon-holed into a job type that you hate. Oh, I've been there and done that. Ugh. Good luck, man.

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Come on, sailor. I love you long time.