Remember When Super Man Flew Around The World Really Fast And Made It Turn The Other Way And Time Went Backwards?

I cut my lawn today with a lawn trimmer. The whole thing, front and back, 'cause I'm that kind of classy. I know. We don't have a second car, but if we did, I'd totally put it up on blocks in the front yard. Maybe add an old fridge or stove too. We... I broke our mower last year and instead of getting it fixed I just kept borrowing my father-in-law's. You know, it wasn't even last year that it broke, it was the end of summer before last. Fuck, am I lazy. No, that's not true. Well, yes it is, but not for the purposes of this post. I don't know, I'm in a funk.

Shit. I just paused in thought for a minute there and noticed my camera which has been plugged into the computer for about two hours now. Excellent. When the Mother Ship arrives tonight and my battery is dead I'll only have myself to blame. At this juncture I should mention that this post has absolutely no point to it at all. And yes, I went back and added 'juncture' to the beginning of that last sentence so I could use 'point' at the end and not have a sentence with two points because that's all wrong.

Where was I? Oh ya, nowhere. Did you know the bigger planets in our solar system rotate faster than smaller planets? If you did you suck. Please shut up now. So ya, Jupiter is two and half times bigger than all the other planets combined and it rotates in less than 10 hours. Tiny little Mercury takes 58 Earth days (Ok, this is kinda because it's got a messed up orbit but cut me some slack). Now if I lived on Mercury, a 58 day, er, day might be enough for me to get things done around the house, spend enough time with the kids so I don't feel like I'm neglecting them and still have enough "me" time to keep from going crazy. Oh ya, and then there's that black haired woman I share a bed with. I think her name starts with a... wait, it'll come to me.

And now it's an hour and a half after I wrote that because I had to stop and watch Bones. I love Bones, and not just because of my man-crush on David Boreanaz, but tonight's episode was just annoying me.

Dear Hollywood,
If you tell me that one of the characters I'll be watching in (insert show name here) is Japanese, is from Japan, has a Japanese name and, oh look, the actor playing him is Japanese... I get it. It's enough. I really don't need the hokey canned Zamfir pan-flute "Asian" music in the background. The same goes for every other ethnic group or foreign country the show may be visiting. I know you're playing to the lowest common denominator, but seriously, if they're that dumb they probably can't afford to buy your advertiser's products anyway so screw 'em.

And oh my god the theme song from Greatest American Hero just came on and does anybody remember that show? I remember watching it with my mom and I'm pretty sure she was letting me stay up late to see it and remember Robert Culp as the curmudgeonly FBI agent? He was great. Guess he must be dead by now. I have a thing for hokey 70's songs. And yes, I've used the word 'hokey' twice now in one post. Whatevs. You're still here, aren't you?

I made these for my boys. Cause I'm a crafty bitch.



End.